Getting through the Schoolday When You Have FM
Coping at school can be tough when you have fibromyalgia. Sitting on uncomfortable chairs, getting to different classes around campus, and carrying all your textbooks can be a challenge. You may also have to cope with teachers who don't understand why your concentration fades away in the middle of a lesson, or that it was just impossible to get your homework done last night because you were so fatigued. You need a good strategy to tackle the various challenges school can present.
You may want to start by listing all the things you struggle with at school. Then brainstorm and try to come up with possible practical solutions. For example:
- If you have a tough time carrying your school books around, would it help to use a luggage cart, to have an extra set of books to keep at home, or to have multiple lockers at different locations within the school?
- If you are really tired by lunchtime, could you be provided with a quiet place to rest during lunch break or any free periods you have?
- If writing notes increases your pain, could your teachers provide you with handouts or their printed notes?
Once you have listed all the problems and some practical solutions, the next step is to approach the school and to discuss whether your solutions can be put into practice. It may be appropriate for your parents to go with you to offer their support and help explain how fibromyalgia affects you on a day-to-day basis. It is important that your teachers understand the symptoms you're coping with and how they can help you. It is also useful to take some information on fibromyalgia or a letter from your doctor to explain your symptoms in more detail and the medical reasons why you need this extra help.
Carla found her teachers to be very supportive, "I now use a laptop because writing is painful, although I do need help carrying it from class to class," she explained. "I am also allowed more time to do homework if I need it, and the teachers try to help as best they can."
Stephanie also finds writing difficult and uses a computer to type up her notes. "My teachers are very understanding," she said. "They have moved their classes around to accommodate me as I cannot manage the stairs or walk for a long time. Also, I dictate my exams—but it does make me feel a little uncomfortable, as I have to dictate to a teacher!"
One problem both these students still experience is sitting for the duration of a lesson and maintaining their concentration. Often, a short break can make all the difference and knowing that you can leave the classroom whenever you need to can take away any anxiety. Jane didn't like having to ask each time she needed to leave the classroom, especially when she was struggling with IBS symptoms. The school devised a "red card" system, where she could simply place the red card on the teacher's desk and leave the room immediately without any questions being asked. This freedom made her feel a lot less anxious about being stuck in the classroom and made her more willing to go to school.
Here are some other solutions that pupils have come up with:
- Using a support cushion to sit more comfortably
- Using physical education lessons to do an individualized exercise program
- Permission to use the school or staff elevator if one is available
- Arrangements to dictate or to type examinations
- Time extensions for home work and coursework
- Developing a part-time schedule with a reduction in the number of subjects you are taking
- Teachers provide work you can do at home if students are unable to attend for several days
Another major issue you may have to face at school is trying to explain to your friends the different symptoms you have, how they make you feel, and how they can change from day to day. Often with fibromyalgia you look really healthy, and some people can think that if you look okay, you must feel all right. Your friends may think you're faking it to get out of classes, especially when changing symptoms makes no sense to them.
If your friends have no experience of pain, then it can be difficult for them to understand, which can be frustrating for you. Take some time out to explain to your closest friends how unpredictable the symptoms of fibromyalgia are, and that sometimes you can do certain things and at other times you can't, and that you may have to cancel plans you made with them at the last minute—and you find that as annoying as they do. In the end, if they are your real friends, they should be supportive of you and be ready to try to understand.
